Yeah I have been away… but life is getting really busy… or maybe I was and still trying to convince myself that it actually is… I don’t know, but I thought that it’s easy to run away and ignore how I am feeling regarding everything around me… and me… I kept myself busy with work and people… My schedule was going to work in the morning, hanging out with friends in the evening, and then go home exhausted and fall asleep in a minute or two (My family hated me for that!)… this is exactly what was happening in the past five months… it wasn’t my life actually… there was no input whatsoever… I didn’t grow mentally and/or emotionally.. all I have done is work and then laugh over meaningless things! I mean, what a life is that? I lost the “good balance”, which helps any individual in the world to do everything, and grow… I have forgotten all my good friends, and kept hanging out only with friends who made me laugh my heart out… I was so numb… The problem is that, I didn’t know that I am feeling the way I am… till today… Unfortunately Valentine’s Day brings hurtful memories that I want to get away from… I really tried to ignore the fact which says that “today is valentine”… I promised myself that I will block the complicated emotions that I have… and I kept telling myself that my gift will be watching the humorous movie which my friend told me about… I kept blocking all the tears inside, and didn’t allow myself to feel the pain… till this moment… and now, all I am trying to do is not to let a human being see the huge rounded circles that are surrounding my eyes… and my Santa nose…
Thursday, February 14, 2008
I received a message from a friend…a friend whom I don’t see daily or laugh with all the time… but she knew where I was standing… because she’s a friend….
The message was “I know that you are feeling the same way I do… Happy valentine’s sweetie:) “
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On February, 18, 2008 10:53 AM , fantasia1982
from Jordan
said:
from Jordan
said:yeah I know Mr. and Mrs. K 
I do care for you guyz kaman
thanks for your nice words bro
On February, 18, 2008 11:30 AM , wonders
from United Arab Emirates
said:
from United Arab Emirates
said:Hey babe, happy belated Valentine.
You just have to let go.... literally CUT those bad memories and let your soul swim back to the surface again
On February, 18, 2008 11:37 AM , fantasia1982
from Jordan
said:
from Jordan
said:Thanks wondora al gomar :D
well dear, this is what I am trying to do... and I think I am getting there, it's just I am doing it the wrong way... I have to face it you know?.. and I felt better when I wrote it down, and now I when I read it again, I felt stupid :D
thanks dear, hope to see you soon =)
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from Jordan
Hi , Happy valentines day
Listen , me and Mrs. K are really thankful for the message u sent , we hope 7ala will grow up to be excellent in her classes and determinant in being A N# 1 just like you ... And , complicated like her father ! ;)
No , I mean tall like me
Mrs. K asked me to reply back but I was really too busy to do so in the very first 5 minutes after she did then I forgot ... You know that my span attention is only 3 minutes ...
Esma3y , we care for you .. A lot you know!